Stepping back

I think that my job is about keeping the wheels in motion as we roll up the mountain. Today, well starting yesterday, I shut down work and popped in a movie -- Coco and Igor, it starts with a wonderful kaleidoscope intro -- and fell asleep on it, quite simply. And this morning I didn't run. And I am not in the office yet at 8 o'clock, and I didn't check my email once.

It's about to be christmas, you know. I'm lucky to have welcoming, appreciative colleagues and pleasant work environment, what I didn't have before. I'm thinking that there is a 3 month period of harshness, then a 6 month period of getting into the spin, and then, I should be more comfortable. Plus I will have a hollerday.

Maybe I have to look at my life more long term. Be easy on me. And stuff.

Relaxing, like I do now, is amazing. I shall have some more of this.

Luvx.

Descentes

I had a bad night, and my mind is still captive of things to do, things to remember, as if all threatened to run away with the wild horses. My thoughts are obsessive about one thing, and for once I can't blame the one thing: work, because the pressure is mine.

Today I didn't run because of the night I had. Perhaps the strong beer was not a good idea. Taking the wrong pill at night, too, I think. I worry more than folks can imagine. I am not depressed. I don't remember my dreams. I am hoping for a good day.

Amourx.

Deep belly

These days are amazing, I have to admit.

Nothing much is expected of November, even after it turned over to December. The blurry dusk, everything wrapped in a daze, we witness the change of time drawing itself until the first blizzard comes. We celebrate in the dark, and secrets are shared. At some point we will have a new year, but not today.

Me, I'm having a spell. This morning I did the tree as I walked to work (this is a hand posture or mudra), and I was told about the oak tree and the reed at the end of it. I hear a deep belly laugh as I type, hahahaha what an amazing story today was.

Good things:
The blizzard
The huge, beautiful new knitted scarf!
The appropriateness of finishing the scarf the day of the blizzard
The morning walk
The warm bright lights and the coffee
Commuting in 10 minutes
The friendly colleagues
The eye of danger
The easy ticket to the show

luvxx

Little Hero Wannabe

Today, well. It was a day where things collapse together, so tightly they need to be bundled into too little time. A day when blank head space happens when asked a simple question. But the key to today is Containment. This was contained, and I am now free of it (but reminded that I need to keep my iphone close for work related emails).

Perilous work, how I somehow strive in it at times. Little hero wannabe, you have to be one to do this.

Outside of that perimeter, well... I took the morning walk (the jog was getting taxing, so I took an easier route today). I did the plant (luminotherapy) and the tree (meditations) and my mind is quite sane, and my energy seems good. Why I'm even back into knitting, contemplating the scarf and its last repeat before I can wrap myself in its glory. The new morning regimen, on day three, is quite positive.

I received some needed positive feedback, today. The crucial meeting was postponed, giving me time. The impossible is being met as much as I can foresee. Things are contained.

Maybe with this chance of equilibrium, I can start looking at the other spheres. The other spheres.....

Amourx.