Things for my Real Life

How about a quiet and peaceful post. I am back from a kayaking foray on nearby islands of Boucherville, and a bite at La Pizzaillole. Oh and 2 or 3 hours of resting while i listen to Hector Berlioz (I have days of classical music that I downloaded for 10$, I don't know it much so I pick a composer on days like today to see what happens). It was quite nice. Big. Signs abound that I am slowly growing wiser (this is my preferred synonym to older).

I am not doing this innocently. I need these long moments to de-stress. There is only so much that I can take in, and do, and after I get all like woh, I need a break.

I'm kind of gaging my stress level still... like even being with copain was difficult. I can't deal with it. hmm...

Tomorrow I have a bit of a project to write down. It's going to be good. I also hope that I will finally send off my income tax report of the last two years. I have no excuses. Well...

Other things are always difficult like going to the doctor in time. Things for my real life. For sure that went down the ditch the last couple years.

I had a thought about what if... wondering if I would have kids. I'm 36 so the topic is naturally one. Would I have a family if I had always had solid foundation, a stable and loving environment and general ok luck in life? I dunno. Maybe. But then I wouldn't be me - at all!

Honestly, just a good partner is swell enough. I'm way too tired for kids. If they came along by their own means, that's fine. I'm not going to force it.

See how life gets heavy!

Sooo I am nearly finishing my pills - a good thing. I think that my brains works a bit differently than for most people. I have a different appreciation of time, and am a very 'feeling' person. Imagine big fuzzy balls of feelings and impressions circling around you and getting in contact with you. That's how I work - like I have a feeling meter that goes up and down and absorbs things.

I rarely decipher things down to the detail. Details are blurry. Conversations are blurry. I remember all the words, but they are second to the emotion fuzz that comes off them. Sometimes it's hard to decide what to believe, the words or the fuzz. Often they are very distinct.

That may be why I am an introvert. Looking in someones eyes, reading them, and revealing mine. Quite intense for me. I take it small doses.

Amourx.