Glasses

Ok so maybe the clothing design business is a bit of a stretch, I admit. And I find it very funny that knitting is what jump started this lofty and crazy dream. Knitting is surely the most unproductive activity one can do business wise. That and maybe reading. And I love both. What can I say, I'm a dreamer.

But but but, I'm not looking at clothes the same way I tell you, and I have a plan. Note that most of my posts have a plan that I usually don't follow. I'm not practical, no sire. Anyway there is a top that I will make, but first I need to... clean up my place and clear out a sewing space and get a machine. I'm hoping to get that done this week-end. HA HA.

I've been trying to take care of my fragile moods and burned out body, and I found something that works well, that's what I wanted to write about. Work started again this week and it started hard as expected, and my mood was getting down and I was going through the motion like a machine. Get up, work, eat, sleep, and repeat. And the thoughts are all like, everything sucks, I suck, I'm not great... and then I think about other people and think, they think I'm odd, they hate me, I don't belong... That's the mood going low part that could go worse, and I didn't know what to do because I have NO ENERGY.

But I found perhaps a small way that seems to work. I try to do one thing, a very small thing, that makes me feel good. I try to think what that can be, what's doable considering the other stuff I gotta do and the little energy I have, but there is always something. I got me a pair of glasses! The one I lost in september, replaced :). Beautiful.

I walked around the block at lunch. I did my expense report and this evening I felt that I had some energy after work! So I walked on to the shops thinking that I would by a book, but I bought... GREAT CLOTHES! That my friends, is a rare and dear thing to happen unexpectently. Good quality, great fitting clothes. 4 pieces!

It works, I feel good. It may sound like retail therapy but it's not. I really have a problem finding and buying clothes, and I dress badly as a consequence, and feel rotten about it generally. Anything else would be just buying stuff, but not these clothes. These clothes are good for me.

I also bought a fitness mag. All and all, I feel a bit more pumped up, a bit more positive, and a bit more capable.

That's all,

Good night and Amourx.