Crisp

Belle journée dans le nord incluant du ski sur des pentes douces, je les sens encore. Ça enjolive le temps. Le spa ensuite, le motel, la longue route en voiture. Tout ce que j'aime.

Amourx.

Je vais savoir

Je me demande s'il y a du sens ou du mal à écouter buddha en buvant du vin. Vous croyez?

Inspiration du moment

J'ai découvert Houzz.com dernièrement et depuis ce temps, je n'ai aucun problème d'inspiration pour mon condo, qui est toujours en mode 'fonctionnel mais sans personnalité', sauf pour le petit désordre qui est ma signature. Ils montrent même des scènes de paysage grec et de jardins du monde aujourd'hui, qui sans être des idées déco, me réjouissent toute autant et je rêve d'un petit voyage secret.

Je suis aussi inspirée par le yoga, qui me donne aussi envie de faire un voyage du autre type. Je pense que je peux prendre cette voix plutôt que de voir un psy, c'est efficace et beaucoup plus naturel et facile.

Voilà pour le moment. Pour mon blogue, mon blogue futur, j'essaie de tendre un filet sur le sol. Un jour il s'y déposera je crois bien.

Amourx.

Hey there - I'm fine. I'm still here, I'll be back. I've restarted yoga, am knitting a bit, am tired now. Job got better, happier, still uber demanding I think. Nothing else is up. It's winter, I sleep and rest when I can.

Amourx.

AntiRev

Hey there. This is morning 2 of my 2011 work year. I didn't make any resolutions but I wanted to file a progress report. I know I need pics to file my progress and I'm thinking of doing in a less personal blog. It would be interesting that you see the state of my home, and that I see it too. This year I would like to discover ways to make my life easier, prettier, better without any big, tiresome expense of money. That's easy to say after buying me all this nice stuff during the holiday break, hehe.

So without any resolutions made, I had started to clean on sunday. Just an hour or two, spread out in the hole day. Lifting and hiding away clothes, dishes and specially great balls of dust from all over the floor gives a noticeable lift to my spirit. Must remember the huge effort-to-benefit ratio. Cause I will live a long time in dusty messy places (hear years) and a matching mood. I 'know' this even when I'm down, but don't often act on it.

When I am cleaning, I am sometimes conscious of the harsh inner critic that is making it all extra painful. When I see the detail of a mess, say a sock in a ball of dust, I get very wearied. It's very discouraging. So now, I take special care in noticing that I don't dislike the detail of a task. I try to pay attention to the moment. This is not tedious, or difficult, hell it can even be pleasant. Hands in warm suds gently stroking dishes that will help to nourish me later. Watching dirty water emptying out after a deep clean.

Yesterday I thought I'd clean one thing, and ended up washing the kitchen cabinet doors and floors. This is again a high impact clean-up that is not difficult or lengthy. I think that I can fly with this concept.

There is no thoughts about my work today because I feel that it is well contained - yay - and that I can start filling up the other parts of my life. Such as eating. I would like to start preparing my own food because I have a hunch that this will help me find pleasure back. I'm still not easily inspired, but I decided to go to the market during lunch and buy one food everyday. Well yesterday I bought some celery and I'm not sure how to prepare it, so I've been eating solely spaghetti with a meat sauce I prepared on Sunday for lunch, dinner, and lunch today again. Well at least I made it, and that's fun. I can't taste it much because I am still fully congested.

I finished the side to side part of a shrug that I knit over the holidays. It's very big. Perhaps too big. I am pausing because I'm not sure if I want to seam it before or after blocking. Ho hum... probably before... it will be harder to seam but faster, cause this thing is very dense, it takes days to dry up.

Righty-ho, on with my day. May yours be a pleasant one.

Amourx.

2011 More and better

Hey there,

I just wanted to drop you a note, to say hey, I'm fine, I'm here. I'm still killing it.

It's new years. I've been quiet. How does this change things... Well I've been sick too, a cold forced me to bed most of the week. I didn't suffer, I just had to kick back. I couldn't turn the world around, but I never can in a holiday.

I didn't set foot outside today. I wanted to recharge - I can never do that enough. I cleaned and cooked and made hot lemonade and it was never difficult. Nothing I can't handle.

I ordered a big tv and sound system, after the day I bought an electric kettle and a slow cooker and a zipped knit hoody made with some alpaca that's very warm. Yesterday, I ordered an entire Mary Kay kit from my sister. It's more buying stuff for me and pays my sister too. But certainly it was superfluous (I wear little makeup).

The tv set was a spur of the moment thing but I think that it will do me good. I will rearrange my living room and start adding personal touches to my home. I got it because of netflix and the fact that video stores around my place are crap. This way i get to plug in my computer and play anything, or download straight from netflix from the blue ray player that came with it. It's pretty stuff, bought at a good bargain, at the best moment I think.

Am I avoiding things well, yes. Not exercise cause I was sick, I will start again this week. Not work cause I am anxious about it, but this is not starting today (tomorrow, yes). My love life, yes. This is unchanging. I just know that I inhibit a lot, if that's a verb. I do need to change it this year.

The pills... they are keeping me even steven. I don't know if this flattens me out, makes me care a little bit less. I think so. But under the fog I'm still there and I remember, that I want more and better.

Happy 2011, hope you are well.

Amourx.